This poem I wrote awhile back in 2009. Things have changed much and at the same time they haven't. Maybe you too, struggle with this great idea of God's grace.....
Jesus today I was a good little Christian
Opened my Bible right away
Folded my hands to pray
I didn’t lie, cheat or steal
Nor did I cuss at the guy who cut me off when I was behind the wheel
Jesus ,don’t you think I deserve a merit
A merit to receive your grace today
To deserve the blessings you have showered upon me
A merit for the sunshine
For my health
For my husband who works so hard
And the 4 children by my side
Jesus, don’t I deserve a merit?
But what about yesterday Jesus?
I didn’t open my Bible right away
Didn’t fold my hands to pray
I might have lied, cheated and stole
Maybe I didn’t cuss that guy out loud for I knew the children would hear
But what about the thoughts deep with in my soul?
Jesus, did I deserve a demerit?
A demerit for I didn’t deserve your grace
For the blessings you showered on me anyway
For those undeployed years
For a husband who loves an unsubmissive wife
And the 4 children who try their best to obey
Jesus don’t I deserve a demerit?
Merits when I’m “good”
Demerits when I’m “bad”
Isn’t that how it works?
Jesus, I want to believe I deserve your grace
I’m struggling to deserve your grace Lord
Pride, selfishness, unthankfulness
The list could go on
There is nothing in me to be desired
Lord, how can I deserve anything?
Why Lord would you die for me?
Help me Lord to see truly what you meant grace to be
Earning our way was never the plan
Only the FREE gift of grace can bridge the gap
THANK YOU Lord for it is your grace that has set me FREE!
~kj 20 April 09
But we are all like an unclean thing,And all our righteousnesses are like filthy rags; We all fade as a leaf, And our iniquities, like the wind, Have taken us away. Isaiah 64:6
For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, 9 not of works, lest anyone should boast. Ephesians 2:8-9